Wednesday, May 27, 2015

Scholar Award Revoked For Revealing Dress

I'm considering turning my blog name into "What The Fuck Is Wrong With People" these days. It's a question I find me asking myself dozens of times a day quite often. I find it perplexing that a species that it so many ways is so evolutionarily advanced in some ways can maintain a levels of evolutionary retardation that are unrivaled. How the fuck have we made it this far?

Today I'm reading the news as I always do and I come across dozens of things that make me want to punch somebody in the spleen but I chose this particular one because I've seen similar issues multiple times recently in the news.

The actual story is here.

I'm going to shorten the story for the sake of my attention span. Here is my version. National Honor Society Student (i.e. smart girl) gets an aware for being a smart girl. At the ceremony for her award the smart girl wears a dress which oddly, sometimes girls do. I know, you know where I'm going already. How dare that bitch wear a dress! Legs might be seen! Unfuckingbelievable isn't it?

Bear with me, we've become distracted. Anyhow, smart girl wears a dress and you're guessing it was too short aren't you? You're wrong! I said bear with me, we're losing focus, becoming distracted. It has *gasp* "spaghetti straps!" For the love of all that's holy! "Spaghetti straps" are the work of the devil as we all know. They are in fact his creation for the sake of distracting the male version of the species and causing him to lust and want and maybe even have a wank in public at which point Satan gets his soul! Do you see the fucking crisis people?! Think about all that sexy, sexy shoulder that is going to be showing! When people ask me what I like about a girl the first thing I think of is shoulders how about you? Oh dear lord I've become distracted yet again by shoulders.

I'm going to show you the dress now. Please try to control yourselves and I'm praying I don't get arrested for posting this scantily clad underager but here goes.

                    I didn't take this picture. It's not my picture. I'm not claiming this is my picture.

So anyway, as you can surely see, the harlot on the right is the one in question. Wearing this tragic affront to humanity and to 8lb. 6oz. baby Jesus in a tuxedo t-shirt. I know, I know, she should be punished for this. Never fear, she was. They took her smart girl award away from her for being an evil devil worshipping whore! They said she broke the dress code and took that award right away from her for being scandalous and lacking good Christian... or Muslim morals or some shit but they got her! Got her good I tell you! #FightingTheGoodFightForBabyJesus or something like that.

Ok I can't do it anymore. I've run out of angry sarcasm. Honestly my point here is this. Who the fuck makes these rules? Who the fuck made this "dress code?" What wank stain is responsible for this blatant idiocy. I want him or her banished to Syria. You don't want to see skin then go to a fucking shit hole that has dark-age-ass rules like you think we need here. I don't doubt for a second that this is what these people feel is appropriate for women to wear. The thing is that if you want women to wear this and like women who wear this and find women who want to wear this then good on you.

My problem lies in the fact that your puritanical ass-hatical beliefs tend to spill the fuck over and pollute my my goddamn field of vision! So, you can take them and remove your magic underpants butt flap and shove those fucking beliefs up there until we can't see them anymore. If you need help I'll get a splintered table leg and help. This isn't the fucking 1600's and your stupid ideals are out of date. I have a crazy idea. How about we stay the fuck out of other people's business and let women wear what women are comfortable with. I have no doubt this will come with consequences but we'll all get a good laugh.

Yeah, you see! Nobody wants to see that! Well, somebody might want to see that but they're cracked like you are if you're male and you don't want to see scantily clad fit women. Are you honestly so mentally weak that you can't handle it without some adverse side effect? Go home and have a wank, release some fucking tension and I promise you the god that may not even be there won't give a shit even if he is. If you buy the whole god thing he didn't make breasts and vaginas and penises to embarrass people. I he did make us and he did make them he would have not thrown your ass onto this earth without something to cover them up but HE DID! How do you people manage to reproduce? Do you poke it through a hole in a sheet and hope for the best? What is mankind's fucking deal with sex and nudity? Honestly, what is the fucking deal, I just don't get it.

If we're worried about high school boys being distracted then we're fighting a losing battle because a strong wind will give him a boner. He doesn't need to see shoulder to sit there fantasizing about the girl sitting next to him... I promise it doesn't make a bit of difference.

Why are we so worried about the girls tempting the boys anyway. Clearly the boys tempt the girls as well which you would notice if you knew how to read. I see fucking two articles a day about a female teacher getting into shit for riding male students in their spare time. People have sex. People have a drive for sex. People are fucking human and we can't change the desires we have. If she's comfortable being around people in the outfit then that's her choice not yours. Why the fuck can't we just leave the "burn the witch" bullshit where it lies... in the history books. No, you assholes have to keep dredging it up hoping to create some religious eden where vaginas and nipples and penises are banned but magically we all reproduce anyhow and carry on the species. A lot of fucking idiots humans are and I'm ashamed that when I'm looked upon by my pet cats or the possum outside in the goddamn tree that they might see me as one of you.

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