Thursday, July 9, 2009

Adventures In McDonalds

I went to McDonald's today, MISTAKE number one. I never go to McDonald's because they feed you toxic filth. I'm confident that enough of that rubbish will make one glow in the dark but I'm sure as shit not going to test the theory.


So anyway, I had to work far away from home and office and I had to get up at the asscrack of dawn so I didn't feel like making myself breakfast to take with me or getting up early enough to eat one before I left. I decided when I got a break to get myself some breakfast burritos because they somewhat resemble edible food on occasion. THIS WAS NOT THAT OCCASION!

I ordered three breakfast burritos, a hashbrown, and a milk. I also asked for 6 packs of hot sauce, 2 for each burrito. When I receive my order I usually check because I know McDonalds is usually staffed by retards but today I failed to do so. I checked before I left the parking lot though. When I looked in the bag I got two burritos, 1 pack of hot sauce, and no hashbrown. So, back through the drive through I went. I explained exactly what I ordered and exactly what I had gotten. She said drive to the second window and I did. This time I received another bag. Inside the second bag I immediately checked and she had given me 1 more burrito, 1 more pack of hot sauce, and still no hashbrown.

Again I told her what she had done and she actually looked at me with one eye (the other appeared to be oriented toward something 90 degrees to her left) like she was doing the math in her head. What the hell is so difficult about this. She went back, fucked around for a minute, and returned with 1 hashbrown, and one more pack of hot sauce. This time I'm pissed. I say to her "that's three packs of hot sauce, I asked for 6, that means I would like 3 more" and I held up 3 fingers. She gets me 3 more and says. "Thank you, sorry about that". Holy fucking christ, if I could have one wish it would be that stupid were physically painful!

When I finally get to eating my food I found that my 3 burritos might have actually been equal to 1.5. Usually the things are a decent size, these things were fucking tiny. Apparently McDonalds is tightening their belt. They were literally half the size they usually are.



I didn't consider this a terrible thing because I really probably didn't need 3 normal sized burritos anyhow so I just let it go. I think this is proof that McDonalds is in fact an "equal opportunity employer". Can't spell your own fucking name or count to 6, we'll give your stupid ass a job!

1 comment:

Josh said...

that looks like a j rolled by snoop dogg....hahaha